Thank you, City of Milwaukee, for issuing me a citation warning today for not putting my garbage cans “on the curb and as close to the drive as possible.” I have rectified the situation, as illustrated in the attached picture. They stand a good seven feet tall now, and are a beacon of responsible citizenship for all the neighborhood to see.
If you need me, I’ll be in the gym for the next four months of this wretched winter, building muscle in order to lift these cans up onto the snow mountain when they’re actually full. Unless the polar vortex keeps the temperature at -20, in which case I’ll just be in the house, crying.
